Don't judge me!
by xXNinXGalXx
Summary: It's about Sakura's life, about how much she's suffered about how she feels and how Sasuke comes to understand. Please tell me if it should be a T or an M or whatever!
1. The Awakening

**Here is my fanfic (Tada) I hope u like it if u don't maybe u could give me some advice?**

Sakura sat on her bed, tears poured down her cheeks as she remembered the words Sasuke had said to her "The feeling of a parent yelling at you is nowhere near what he feels", the replayed in her head again and again. "He knows nothing about me " she thought aloud as her hands clenched the bed sheets, tears streamed onto them. No one knows what I feel Sakura thought. Everyone in the village just thought she was an annoying girl, a weak girl, a girl with a loving family, a spoiled brat and most of all they thought she was a BURDEN. The only reason she loved her team was because they were almost like her, Naruto was an outcast and had no parent. Sasuke came from a great clan and had to suffer by losing them all. Sakura couldn't help but always feel left behind, she couldn't just walk up to them and tell them her lifelong story! What hurt her the most though was that she was always left out in training, not once was she asked if she would like to train, all she would do was trail behind them. "but then, who said life was fair" Sakura said in a shaky voice, after all she thought since the moment I was born life was not fair.

**Flashback into Sakura's past**

**3** year old Sakura Haruno was crying in her room, why was it that she had been born into _this_ family. Her family was known to be one of THE strongest clans, but Sakura was what her clan called a unawakened ninja, which meant that she could not yet properly control her powers. Everyday her parents would put her through a series of tasks and she would only end up hurt. Sakura's parents would get angry and call her a worthless excuse of the clan. They said she was a burden, a child that was not meant to be born the "accidental " child. They were also ashamed of her looks, her parents thought the pink hair was abnormal, they thought her green eyes looked funny with the pink and most of all they thought she had a big forehead. This meant that Sakura was not allowed outside, Sakura would see how her mother would baby her older siblings and would feel left out. So Sakura just curled up in her bed and cried.

**4** year old Sakura Haruno was listening to her parents argument as she clutched her teddy tightly, the voices were muffled because of the closed door and a few minutes later she gave up and skipped away. The next morning Sakura's family started to act strangely, they smiled at Sakura and even asked how she was feeling. Sakura narrowed her eyes in suspicion but simply shook of her family's strange behaviour. Sakura "today you have a doctors appointment" her mother said, "Be ready by nine"she continued. Sakura got dressed and grabbed her coat, she ran outside as they made their way to the hospital. The Nurse then led Sakura to a room that had a bed and a window with a beautiful view. Sakura struggled to take her hand from the Nurse then turned to her with wide green eyes and said "where are my parents". The Nurse looked sympathetically at her and simply said "don't worry about that honey, you'll understand". The Nurse then turned around and left, Sakura then decided to look through the window while she waited, she wished she hadn't, the sight made her blood run cold. Her parents were leaving, they were going back home, in a panic Sakura turned around and tried stretching her arm to reach the knob, she grabbed it and twisted it but it didn't budge, she was locked in! Sakura screamed and cried, but was knocked over as the Nurse came in "What's wrong honey" the Nurse said with her very fake smile, "Why are my parents leaving me here" She cried out. The Nurse took a deep breath and told her that she was to be experimented on since she was a slow learner in the clan and she had been willingly offered. The Nurse also said that they were experimenting because her hair colour was very unusual compared to the rest of family, Sakura's face was pale, she hugged her teddy tighter "How much was I sold for?" she asked, "2000 pounds" The nurse replied. (or whatever the money units is in a different country.) The Nurse couldn't help but feel sorry for Sakura a tears streamed down her chubby cheeks. (the sight was adorable the nurse couldn't resist) She smiled a real smile at Sakura and gave her a lollipop. Sakura immediately stopped crying as her eyes widened, she had seen her siblings eating these, it was called a "Lolly". Sakura muttered a timid thank you and jammed the lollipop in her mouth, the nurse chuckled at the delightful expression on Sakura's face and said that it was not healthy for children to stay up this late. Before the nurse could leave Sakura beckoned her closer, she put her hands around her mouth as if she were about to tell the nurse somthing but when the nurse came closer she felt a kiss being placed on her cheek. As soon as Sakura did that she ran to the bed and curled up with a peaceful smile on her face.

**5** year old Sakura Haruno was waiting for her favourite Nurse Katsuki to start her shift, she sat on the bed humming as she read a story book that Katsuki had given her. Katsuki and Sakura had worked together and her ninja skills were improving. Sakura heard the door creak and was about to launch herself onto the figure until she realised it was someone else. "Where's Katsuki" Sakura asked, "I'm sorry but Katsuki was in a terrible accident and is no longer with us" The new Nurse said with a fake smile. "Katsuki is dead...?" Sakura said questioningly with wide eyes. "unfortunately" The Nurse said, but Sakura thought that she did not look sorry at all. Why was it that whenever she was happy the world suddenly hated her. Tears streamed down her cheeks, that night Sakura crawled out of the bed and took the treats and gifts Katsuki had given her. She packed them in a bag and jumped out of the window. She'd rather live on the streets than stay with that evil new Nurse.

A** 6** year old Sakura Haruno fainted outside the gate of the leaf village, she was half starved and completely exhausted, the gates opened and she was taken to the Leaf village hospital, after that she was sent to the Hokage tower. The Hokage asked her why she was here and Sakura told them she had come to find a safe place to live. Sakura also told them that her parents would be arriving after she had found a house to live in. Sakura handed over her hard earned money, asking if she could buy a house, the Hokage agreed and said she was now to live in the leaf village and was to be recognised as a citizen. The next day Sakura bought a Newspaper to see if any of the trouble she had caused was reported, luckily it wasn't but then a small article caught her eye. CLAN MURDER the headlines read showing pictures of the victims, Sakura was shocked since the pictures resembled her own family. This isn't fair Sakura thought, I should not be feeling sad I should be happy she thought, why can't life be fair for once she thought. Sakura rushed all the way home and cried but then she remembered that school was starting tomorrow, so she wiped her tears and forced herself to sleep. The next day Sakura had hoped that her classmates would be nice to her and did not make fun of her looks, as soon as Sakura stepped foot in the academy she became an instant target of bullying and she would always be upset, but that was until Ino came along, Ino was her friend and stayed by her side and everyday Sakura hoped that life did not take Ino away from her.

Sakura suddenly snapped out of her flashbacks, she was starting to feel sleepy, Sakura panicked this wasn't good at all she couldn't fall into a deep sleep during a mission. Sakura's eyelids became heavy, this didn't feel like an ordinary sleep. Suddenly she realised what this was, it was her ninja awakening, of all times it had to be now Sakura thought exasperated. Why did it have to happen on the day she was on a mission?, why did it have to happen years too late?, why did it have to happen when she was not on speaking terms with her friends? why did it have to happen on the same day Katsuki died! Then Sakura understood, she had never reflected on her past, so when she did different emotions came out all at once. The awakening has started she thought before she drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

**Sasuke has returned and is one of her friends, she is not talking to them because of a certain issue that has happened! Should the issue be that they found out that Sakura lied or something else, oh and please be nice this is only my second fanfic. :) (I know people must be tired of seeing smiley faces)**


	2. Sorry

**Special, special thanks to SasuSakuisforalways for reviewing and thanks for the advice! I am still thinking on what else to improve on so advice will be appreciated :)**

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The awakening was not what Sakura had expected, it was not a dreamless sleep, no, it was a replay of all her memories. She was perfectly still on the outside but on the inside she has to experience her emotions all over again. The pain of being the unloved one, the pain of having someone taken away from you and the pain of having your friends abandoning you. The awakening meant that Sakura had to control her feelings to become the ideal ninja and so the awakening began.

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**Inside the Dream**

_"Katsuki, wait, don't leave me here!" Sakura cried out as she ran towards the familiar Nurse. All of a sudden Katsuki turned around and transformed into the New Nurse with the fake smile, the New Nurse grinned evilly towards Sakura, "I'm sorry Sakura but Katsuki is dead" The New Nurse said as she advanced towards Sakura with a needle in her hand. Sakura started to scream and as the Nurse advanced she backed away. The Nurse drew closer and closer... Sakura closed eyes "Katsuki..." she thought, "I miss you Katsuki". Suddenly Katsuki's gentle voice filled her head, "Sakura, you can't just give up, you need to be strong". Sakura's eyes snapped open, she glared at the evil nurse as stepped forward, "I'm not scared of you" Sakura started out quietly. _

_The Nurse looked at her in confusion, "I SAID, I'M NOT SCARED OF YOU" Sakura bellowed as Katsuki's voice filled her head. The Nurse backed away in fear as Sakura stomped forward with anger. Sakura reached out to push her away but the illusion blurred and turned into a new one. Suddenly she was surrounded by her friends or the people who **used** to be her friends. Sakura felt all her confidence deflate, in the last situation there had been one person to deal with but now there were many. Then the replay began, "Sakura, I can't believe you tried to kill Sasuke, I trusted you" Naruto said putting emphasis into the word TRUST. All her other friends looked at her with disapproving looks. They insulted her, for a brief second Sakura felt like bursting into tears again like she had done before. But she knew, things HAD to change._

_Sakura stepped forward "What about when he tried to kill me" she said in a broken voice, "If he has the right to kill me, then why shouldn't I?" She questioned them. Sakura turned to Naruto and said "Didn't you care about me... or is it just all about Sasuke?", Naruto simply looked at her in disbelief. She walked towards him and put her hands onto his shoulders "ANSWER ME NARUTO!" Sakura screamed as she shook him violently. She raised her fist and was about to deliver a blow when the scene changed yet again._

_Sakura looked around, it was the place where she had spent her first years of childhood at, in other words her **HOME**. Her parents walked up to her crouching form. "WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BURDENED WITH A DAUGHTER LIKE YOU!" Sakura's father yelled as Sakura flinched at his loud voice. Both her parents yelled things like "YOU WERE AN ACCIDENTAL CHILD YOU WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE BORN, WE ONLY MEANT TO HAVE TWO CHILDREN BUT THEN YOU CAME ALONG, BECAUSE YOU ARE SO WEAK YOU HAVE BROUGHT DISGRACE TO THIS CLAN, I CAN'T BEAR TO EVEN TAKE YOU OUTSIDE BECAUSE OF YOUR STRANGE APPEARANCE!"_

_Sakura just let tears pour out of her eyes, she could deal with a Nurse, she could deal with friends but one thing she could not deal with was her family. All she wanted to do was give up and let herself be consumed by eternal darkness. How could they say such cruel things to her, their OWN child, suddenly Sakura felt her sadness ebb away only to be replaced with anger. She stood up and wiped her tears._

_"Maybe some of those things are true... BUT IS IT MY FAULT I WAS BORN, NO! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, SO START BEHAVING LIKE ADULTS, MAYBE IF YOU HAD TRIED TO BE MORE LOVING AND CARING I COULD HAVE BECOME STRONGER!"Sakura screamed in fury. Her parents looked at her in shock, then the image swirled like the rest, then all Sakura could see was darkness._

_

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_

Then she felt as if her soul had just been thrown back into her body. Sakura awoke with a gasp, she looked around, she was in a hospital. It was hospital for sure but it was not the Leaf village hospital. "Just as I thought no one cared to come and find me" Sakura whispered to herself. A medic suddenly stepped forward with a smile plastered all over her face. "Excuse me" The medic said kindly.

"You look as if your in a bit of a shock, you must be wondering where you are!" The medic stated in a friendly voice. Sakura turned her head towards the medic, she seems really kind Sakura thought, she reminds me of Katsuki. Sakura then stopped her train of thought about Katsuki because the reason of the awakening was to forget the past and get over it. Just like the saying "Don't cry over spilled milk".

Sakura opened her mouth and said "Yes, I would like to know where I am and I would also like to know how long have I been in this state ". The medic smiled "Welcome to the village of stone, you have been here for a whole two weeks, I do hope you are feeling better!" She said enthusiastically.

"**_Two_** weeks" Sakura thought, "I was to finish this mission in a day and a half" She continued think in shock, "I was right, no one cares" Sakura whispered letting her face drop. "Huh, what was that?" The medic asked, "I was just saying thank you for your hospitality but I must get going" Sakura said as she sat up."Okay nice meeting you princess" The medic replied, "_Princess_" Sakura thought.

As Sakura made her way to the exit she saw many people looking at her, her pink usually did attract attention but definitely not this much. Something was wrong, she wondered if the dream had caused her appearance to have some sort of changes, she imagined scars all over her face and that just made her shiver. Sakura looked in the mirror and blinked, then she closed her eyes and shook her head, but what she saw on the mirror was the same.

"What the..." Sakura thought as she looked at her now pale skin, she also had red lips, her green eyes were just a shade darker, her hair was more of a darker more beautiful pink. Her wide forehead was gone. "Damn it!" Sakura shouted, "I can't go back like this" Sakura thought.

After much consideration Sakura decided on pulling her ANBU mask over her face, Sakura was also wearing a black skirt which was less than knee length. She also wore boots , her gloves and black sleeveless ANBU shirt. (Yup, Sakura is ANBU, it's cos she needs the mask.)

After hours of travelling Sakura returned to the Leaf village, she was upset no one had cared but she had to live with it, maybe she could run away to her old village and live there, since all the villagers of that village had died except for her. It was called the village hidden in vines. (could not think of anything else and the thought of swinging on vines sounds nice and I already used crystal so I don't really want to use it again.)

For now she thought I will put up with this, but there will be a time when I leave, Sakura then went to report to the Hokage tower. Tsunade looked up from her work and said "Your late". "I was unconscious for two weeks, so I was taken care of, I'm not surprised you didn't send anyone to find me " Sakura said bitterly.

As she walked through the village she kept her mask on, suddenly Ino stood before her with Sasuke. "Well hello forehead, what too you so long" Ino said in a mocking tone. Sasuke started smirking by her side, "oooooh are you trying to hide your huge forehead with this mask" Ino mocked as she pulled her mas of. Sakura simply blinked.

Sasuke and Ino stared, Sakura felt panicked and started trying to grab the mask out of Ino's hand, Ino smirked and passed it to Sasuke. Sakura let out a frustrated scream as she tried to grab her mask back. Unfortunately for her, he was taller than her, Ino rushed over to call the rest of the ninjas.

Sakura felt like crying, they all laughed cruelly as she tried to grab the mask out of Sasuke's hand. Then she felt somebody push her, Sakura fell and scraped her knee, she couldn't help but let the tears flow instead of letting out a fake smile. "Ha, Sakura your so hated that Tsunade took me in as her student instead" Ino said in a laughing voice. "No one wants you in their team because your a burden, Sensei didn't even pay attention to you!" Naruto said in a equally cruel voice. All the Ninjas smirked.

"You people are so cruel, all of you ganging on one person, your the ones who are weak, Your COWARDS" Sakura gritted out as tears streamed down her face. All the Ninjas froze as they saw tears pour out of Sakura's eyes, "But you nearly killed Sasuke" Naruto said.

"Didn't Sasuke nearly kill me to?" Sakura screamed, "Don't you care about me Naruto?" Sakura said in a quiet voice. Naruto avoided the question and said "It's not Sasuke's fault, when he was young he saw a lot of violence, which probably made him violent towards us" Naruto tried.

"Do you know what happened to me Naruto, from the age of 8 months I started walking, from then my parents tried to train me, but you see I was a baby who needed love and care, they shouted at me and hurt me if I got something wrong." Sakura said to widened eyes

"I watched as they would love my older brother and sister, I was the hated one" Sakura whispered. "They told me I was a mistake, they said shouldn't of been born, they commented on my appearance, I had no friends, I was not allowed outside, my parents were afraid that my clan would've been frowned upon." she continued.

"When I turned four my parents took me to the hospital they said I needed a check up, they left me in a hospital room, Medics wanted to research why my hair and eye colour was different, so my parents sold me to them and left me."Sakura whispered as more tears flowed.

"I then had a nurse Katsuki who I really loved, she was always like what my mother should of been like, about a year later she died in an accident and I ran away, then when I was six I arrived at Leaf village, they allowed me to attend ninja academy, at first I was bullied and had no friends but then Ino came along" Sakura said with a weak smile on her face.

By this time Ino herself was crying, "Then I saw a article, it said my clan had been murdered and it wasn't fair because I felt upset, when they hated me, then I wished that life didn't take Ino or my new friends away from me. " Sakura finished.

The Female ninjas were crying while the Male ninjas had their mouths open and their eyes wide, on the other hand Naruto had his hands clenched by his sides with his hair covering his eyes. Sasuke also had his hair covering his eyes and his hands were folded. "But it looks like life already took my friends away from me, congratulations on making my life hell." Sakura said in a broken voice.

Then she turned around and ran all the way back to her apartment, The others followed her, Sasuke was the fastest but he couldn't catch up to her, ever since her awakening she had become a more efficient ninja. When Sakura reached her apartment she locked the door and all the windows. She jumped into her bed, pulled the sheets over her head, (did that rhyme, or was it just me?) and cried.

Over the next few days people kept trying to call her so she unplugged her phone, Ino tried her mind control jutsu but Sakura just shut her out, the banged on her door she refused to open it. Then Sakura heard her door bust open. "Sakura we're sorry" The ninjas said together.

Sakura didn't care all she said was "Go away, I hate you". Her voice sounded so desperate that they all decided to leave. All of them left except Sasuke, Sakura thought everyone had gone so she was about to get up and wipe the blood off her face but she realised Sasuke was there. He looked at her in shock as he saw the tears of blood all over her face, Sakura immediately threw the covers over herself again.

"Sakura" Sasuke said, "I-I'm sorry" he said, "We didn't know you felt so..." Sasuke trailed off, Sasuke looked at her and saw that she was still sobbing, He went into her kitchen and got a towel which he wet with some water, he also grabbed a glass of water. Sasuke sat Sakura up and handed her the glass of water, Sakura got the message and drank the water, if she kept crying like this she would die from blood loss or dehydration. While Sakura drank the water Sasuke gently wiped the blood of her face. When Sakura finished she laid back down she felt a little better but very sleepy.

"Sakura I made Tsunade..." Ino shouted as she walked into the room, but she backed out when she saw Sakura sleeping. "We have a lot of making up to do for Sakura after we hurt her so bad" Ino said, looking ashamed of herself. "Hn..." Sasuke replied as they shut her door quietly and went to join the rest.

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**Yay a whole second chapter finished, please review, I hope you like it, please tell me if you don't!**


	3. Sadness

**Special, special thanks to WhatChuuKnowBoutMe for reviewing, and I am still thinking on what else to improve on so advice will be appreciated :)**

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Sasuke sighed as he watched Sakura sleeping, she had been sleeping for so many days now, Sasuke couldn't help but feel worried, he was so ashamed of what he had done, all that time she had been hurting inside looking for some love just as he and Naruto did, but she was denied of it. Sasuke now hated himself so much, seeing Sakura crying had made him go into shock, ever since he returned to the village she had not shed a tear, the next moment she was crying so hard that she cried blood instead of tears. Sasuke was about to walk out till he caught side of the calendar.

As Sakura awoke she looked at the Calendar, it was her birthday, not like anyone remembered it, though she would sometimes go out and treat herself to something. Just as Sakura was about to leave the house all the Ninjas arrived. "Hey Sakura we have so much to tell you" Naruto cried out, "Yeah, I made Tsunade accept you as her apprentice again" Ino said excitedly

"I made sure we can do missions as team 7 again" Naruto said in an equally excited voice, they all told her the things tat they had done to make it up to her. "I don't want your pity" Sakura said in a soft hurt voice. "The only reason you people are doing this is because you feel sorry for what happened to me in the past, your not sorry for what you did to me." Sakura continued as fresh tears stung her eyes, she ran out of the house, past all the shocked villagers and out of the gates.

All the other ninjas stood their in shock "I guess we deserved that" Naruto said quietly, Hinata stood next to him twiddling her thumbs, as soon as she had seen Naruto being mean to Sakura, Hinata joined, the only reason was because she loved Naruto. They all looked down at the ground in embarrassment, they kicked the dirt and knew that they were no better than the dirt itself. They all had been selfish, they had taken Sakura for granted, only now did they realise how she could so easily brighten someone's day, now that she had gone they all realised how much they _loved_ her.

Sasuke sighed"Where did Sakura go" he wondered out loud, Sasuke then went to ask all the Ninjas and villagers, they all told him the same thing, she had run straight out of the village. The Ninjas returned upset, they wished that they could've changed the way they behaved and that they had the power to simply change back time .

Meanwhile...

Sakura stood in front of the gates, this was the only place she belonged, the village of genjutsu, all the villages who were skilled in this type of jutsu had united under one name... the HEAVENLY village, those who did not have the skill to unlock it could simply not enter, Sakura hoped that at least here somebody was still alive, Sakura's eyes widened the whole place had been burned to ash. Sakura fell on her knees as tears flowed out of her eyes.

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"We _have _to find her" Sasuke said, "Dammit I know we do, but where would she go?" Naruto said anxiously. "I can't even pick up her scent" Kiba said frustrated as he smashed his head against the tree. "I know where you could find her" a voice said out of the shadows, the voice was so spine chilling that the Ninjas almost jumped out of fear. Sasuke bravely turned around to face the newcomer "and where would that be?"

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**My third chapter finished finally, please please review! and I am so so so Sorry if it's short and rushed, just got so many things to handle!**

**I had this for ages and forgot to upload!**


	4. Forgot TT

**I forgot who the person in the shadows was meant 2 be T-T**

**any ideas?**


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